As I've been calling schools -- and the ones who might take Adam (there are only 2 that integrate) -- I've come to the conclusion that I, and my therapists, must do more to prepare Adam for the basics: ability to sit and attend. Schools consider it a disruption to the class if children are wandering around. We really have to push him harder and I have to give him a little more "tough love." I suppose I am terrified at any other option and I feel that he has so much to offer it would be ashame if he couldn't get into one of the integrated schools.

Adam is downstairs now in his facilitiated play group. Two other boys in the group are also autistic -- but they talk and attend more. It terrifies me. I wonder why Adam doesn't talk and interact as much as they do. I hear him crying. He does not want to be down there with those kids today. But he has to be. There is no other way through this barrier than to push him. When he begins to interact more with other kids, and talks to them, I will be so happy.